Subpoenas for Roger Stone, Alex Jones Expose Bizarre Underbelly of Jan. 6 Attack

Steve Bannon, Roger Stone and Alex Jones walked into a bar… there’s a joke somewhere in there, but I’m damned if I can put a finger on it. I will tell you this: If Bannon and Stone and Jones entered a plot to overthrow the national presidential election, then said plot is even more far out than anyone could have imagined. Paging Mr. Trump. Your table is ready. Today’s special is gall with wormwood. It’s served on a bed of what are you up to with these strange folks?

If the “U.S. House Select CommitteeTo Investigate the January 6th Attack on the United States Capitol” has its way, we may actually come to know the answer to that question. According to The New York Times, the committee “issued five new subpoenas on Monday, targeting allies of former President Donald J. Trump who helped draw crowds to Washington before the riot, including the political operative Roger J. Stone Jr. and the conspiracy theorist Alex Jones.”

Bannon, the former Trump adviser BreitbartThe committee served subpoenas on the founder several weeks ago. He dismissed them with arrogance and was eventually arrested for contempt. Mark Meadows, the former White House Chief of Staff, also ignored subpoenas that were served to him just before Bannon was arrested. Dozens of other subpoenasDuring the investigation, the following were issued:

It’s OK if you have to take a second with this; I certainly did. Bannon is a nihilist who spouts overhyped gibberish like the fountains at the BellagioIn Las Vegas, but he only worked for a few seconds in the Trump White House. Stone is a Batman villain cartoon, sure on the inside with Trump for his role in Russia election scandal. However, he’s a walking joke. And Jones, well… he is shortly to be rendered pantlessThe world is aware that Sandy Hook’s victims’ families were abused by a judge.

“The Select Committee is seeking information about the rallies and subsequent march to the Capitol that escalated into a violent mob attacking the Capitol and threatening our democracy,” Select Committee Chairman Bennie Thompson saidAfter the new subpoenas were made public. “We need to know who organized, planned, paid for, and received funds related to those events, as well as what communications organizers had with officials in the White House and Congress.”

If they decide to testify, there is no doubt that the pair will have a story. Vanity Fair reports:

Jones … has publicly said that he helped organize one of the rallies January 6, where Trump called on supporters to “fight much harder” on his behalf. Jones also spoke at a rally the day before in Freedom Plaza, promoting Trump’s election lies that Democrats “have tried to steal this election in front of everyone” and promising to battle against “tyranny.” “I don’t know how this is all going to end,” the InfoWars host said on the eve of the insurrection, “but if they want to fight, they better believe they’ve got one.”

In their letter to Jones, the January 6 committee acknowledged that he was “recorded telling people not to be violent” during his appearance at that day’s rally. But he also repeatedly raised the temperature in the lead-up to the riot, warning his crowd that they are “under attack” and that they need to “get on a war-footing.” “We declare 1776 against the new world order,” Jones said ahead of the insurrection.

Stone … was one of the biggest proponents of the former president’s Big Lie about the 2020 election, and made appearances at rallies in Washington, D.C., ahead of the January 6 march. Stone is also believed to have used Oath Keepers extremists as bodyguards while in Washington. Stone on Monday denied having “advance knowledge of the events that took place at the Capitol on that day.”

There is plenty of smoke, some fire, but not enough time. Bannon, Stone and Jones are notorious publicity hogs who will almost certainly do everything they can to delay their testimony (while turning a buck off of their “victimhood”). If they can hold the committee at arm’s lengthIf the Republicans win majority control of the House next, the select committee will be rolled into a carpet and put in storage.

But, just take a moment. Say you’re a president staring defeat in the face. It’s not your fault. Who do you call? These guys!

Why not? It’s as simple as buying Greenland or injecting yourself in bleach.