TODAY co-host Dylan Dreyer is sharing some sad news in hopes that it will help others. She revealed that and her husband Brian Fichera are struggling with secondary infertility.
Last winter, they found out she was pregnant with their second child. They'd been trying to give their 2-year-old son Calvin a brother or sister, and it seemed like that would be happening.
Then Dylan started bleeding. She sobbed to her husband: “I think I lost the baby.”
“You didn’t lose the baby,” he said to her calmingly. “It's your body doing what it needs to do. YOU didn't do anything wrong.”
She was comforted by her husband's support, but doctors confirmed that she had had a miscarriage. She went to work on the TODAY show desperately trying to hide her pain.
“I’m devastated, and I have to go to work on the TODAY Show and be happy and smiling and pretend like nothing’s wrong,” she said.
Dreyer’s miscarriage was part of her struggle with secondary infertility, which is when a woman struggles with infertility after having one of more children. According to the University of Wisconsin Hospitals, it impacts 3 million women in the U.S.
Despite its prevalence, people don't often speak about secondary fertility. That's one reason Dreyer has decided to share her struggles publicly.
She got pregnant with her two-year-old son so easily that she thought they would be able to add to their family easily when they decided to expand their family. But after trying for six months, they realized it would be more difficult this time.
She says it's more difficult because Calvin loves babies.
“I see Calvin with other kids and I see how loving he is. My friend just had a baby, and he held her and it’s just so sweet. And I wanna give that to him.”
After the couple tried to conceive for six months, her doctor referred them to a specialist. The standard definition of infertility is one year of trying without success, or six months if you’re over 35.
37-year-old Dreyer found out that she has a low egg count and had an unusual amount of scarring from her emergency C-section with Calvin.
Dreyer says she feels lucky to have Calvin, but that she still wishes to expand her family. She also emphasized that miscarriages and infertility hurt no matter what.
“I just want people to know that, yeah, I’m kind of going through it with you,” Dreyer says. “I don’t know where this ends.”
Please pray for Dreyer and her husband as they try to have another child. May God bless them and Calvin with a new baby.